I was filling out some forms for the new job, and this routine question of emergency contact came up. Between my blood relative who's hundreds of miles away and my best friend within three miles of reach, I chose the latter. But even as the greatest friend that one can ever be, she is still just filling in as a temp. And that's right, among everything that I'm seeking for in life, finding a guy to permanently fill in the role as my emergency contact, is now on the top of the list. |
So, would you like to be my emergency contact? In some weird way, I almost think this is the most romantic thing I can ever say to a guy. Weird, I know. And I can sound queer sometimes. But honestly, in my mind, more than once, I have imagined a candle lit dinner, during which I'd pop this question while smiling at this guy, who beyond everything else that he is, has the kindest heart and warmest hands in the whole wild world.
Yeah, welcome to my fantasy world.
But really, what beats this? Sure, there are plenty of phrases you can say to your special someone. There is "I adore you" that makes you smitten, and there is that overused "I love you" that makes you shaken; there is "Will you marry me" that shows the commitment and there is "I can't live without you" that hints the desperation. But none of these in my mind shows the ultimate trust as my question does. To ask a guy to be your emergency contact, is basically handing your whole life to him, if, God forbid, anything should happen to you. This is beyond telling him that you adore him, you love him, or you want to spend the whole life with him. This is about you breaking down all your walls, and giving up all the control you have in your life, just for one guy, a guy maybe not even that special.
Fantastic, isn't it?
Fantastic it is. But I still don't know if the gap between the fantasy and the reality is too big for me to handle. Hey, maybe it's getting bigger and bigger as we speak. I wouldn't be totally shocked if one day I would just feel all tired and decide to seek no further no more. I guess when that happens, I can either fill in that blank with whoever's name, or just leave it absolutely blank.
You know, I'm actually getting a little tired.
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